Confidence | Success | Contentment

These three states of being are universally sought after. If you’ve ever met someone who exudes these and more, you’ll know what I’m talking about. They are magnetic and curious about life. You want to spend time with them because their energy inspires you. They achieve success in any endeavor. In this post, I’ll share 7 habits you’ll find these people engaging in everyday.

How do they do it?

In my opinion, there is no secret formula to this. While this seems to come naturally to some people, I think everyone can tap into the most confident, successful, and content versions of themselves.

A year and six months ago, I read a book that truly impacted my life. This book was The Slight Edge by Jeff Olson. My brother had just read the book and gave it to me during a time in my life where I felt stuck. I felt paralyzed because of life events that were outside of my control. The book set a framework for me and gave me practical things to think and act upon.

Let’s dig deeper. 

The Slight Edge‘s premise is this:

Your philosophy creates your attitude, your actions, your results, [which] creates your life.

This book made it clear to me that I played an active role in the life I am living.

The people on the upper half of the slight edge curve are the cause of what happens in their lives. They view all the forces that brought them to this point– God, parents, teachers, childhood, circumstances, you name it– with gratitude and appreciation and without blame… The people on the upper curve take full responsibility for all the choices they make in their lives and in their work.  

You and I have the ability to think, reason, and make small and big choices everyday. These choices, however small they seem, are actually the building blocks of our lives. You multiply the impact of these choices when you factor in time.

Because of the effect of time on repeated actions, your moments truly count.

So let’s get to it!

7 Habits

The Slight Edge lists the seven habits below and I’m adding some insights that I’ve observed and experienced. As you read this, you’ll realize that you probably already do these things. These habits are ingrained in us! But something special happens when you become aware of them and can intentionally practice them as you go. This list applies to any area of life: fitness, relationships, career, you name it- the list stands.

1. Show Up

This is first for a reason. It’s been said that showing up is half the battle. This is where the rubber hits the road; where our best intentions are tested. Preparation is key here. Make it easier for yourself by setting yourself up for success:

◊ Big presentation at work the next day? Finalize your talking points the day before and pick out an outfit that makes you look and feel your best! 

◊ Attempting to get up early to work out? Pack your bag the night before to keep yourself from making excuses. Then once your alarm goes off the next day, visualize the post-workout endorphins you’ll feel and you’ll definitely get out of bed. 

2. Be Consistent

If showing up is where the rubber hits the road, consistency is the fuel in your car on the road trip to your dreams. From what I’ve observed, consistency is the not-so-secret ingredient to success. When you commit to doing the thing day in and day out, the results will speak for itself. Your talents and skills will develop even more as you put in the hard work. Yup, even on days you don’t feel particularly motivated to.

◊ Make a realistic plan and stick to it. Figure out your “why” and you will persevere through anything. Don’t quit. 

◊ Life happens, so give yourself grace.

3. Have a Positive Outlook

This one is my favorite. Positivity is a muscle. Work it out. I think positivity starts with gratitude. It requires seeing the good in the midst of the struggle. It is a posture of humility, hope, and openness. Positivity is knowing deep down that things always have a way of working themselves out. Positivity doesn’t mean you’ll be smiling 24/7 and you’ll experience no negative emotions. Your positive attitude is tested best when things aren’t going your way.

◊ Practice zooming out of the situation at hand and reframing. 

◊ Learn to reflect before you react. 

4. Be Committed for the Long Haul 

Oh, time. Some things just take time. I’ve always believed that time is neutral. It isn’t good or bad; I think it depends on what you’re doing with that time. Malcolm Gladwell came up with the 10,000 hour rule: the key to success in any endeavor is to put in about 10,000 hours of practice. That’s a lot of time!

◊ Patience is everything. Life has a natural ebb and flow. You can’t force or rush things. Sometimes we just have to learn to be still. 

◊ Break it down to smaller portions of time that you can manage -> x minutes each day, x times every week. 

5. Cultivate a Burning Desire Backed by Faith

Jeff Olson said it best-

A burning desire backed by faith means deeply, passionately wanting to get somewhere and knowing — not hoping, not wishing, but knowing that you’re going to get there. 

You have to want it. You have to believe you can.

6. Be Willing to Pay the Price

Opportunity costs for days. There’s just no getting around this one. Since there aren’t any shortcuts and you have to show up and be consistent over a long period of time, you’re going to end up with choices. This is the most challenging part of the process because you are going to have to say no to good enough so you can say yes to the best.

◊ Find the balance that works for you. People might not understand your journey. It’s not your job to make them understand or obtain everyone’s approval. 

◊ Prioritize and make time for what’s truly important. Value relationships.

◊ Discipline is choosing between what you want now and what you want most. -Craig Groeschel

7. Practice Integrity

There’s nothing more attractive than a person of integrity. Strength of character is absolutely timeless. CS Lewis defined integrity as “doing the right thing even when no one is watching.” No one is perfect and we are all works in progress. Know who you are and be you in every setting you find yourself in. Align your actions with your words.

◊ Trust your intuition.

◊ Choose purpose over popularity. -Craig Groeschel

I hope you enjoyed reading about the seven habits of confident, successful and content people through the framework of The Slight Edge. How do you live out these habits in your own life? I’d love to hear your insights!

♥ Bianca