I took a stand-up paddle board yoga class and I learned about my fears.
I try to spend most of my Saturday mornings outside. I usually start off my weekend with a beach run in Corona Del Mar or a hike somewhere in Laguna Beach. This morning, @supbliss was hosting a stand-up paddle board (SUP) yoga class in Newport Beach led by Kylan Fischer (@yoga_ky). I was really excited to do a full yoga class in the water. I’ve gone paddleboarding since and did a few poses but the last time I took a SUP yoga class was during a yoga retreat in Aruba with Rachel Brathen (@yoga_girl). You can see more from that retreat at #BiancainAruba!
I can’t seem to sleep in on Saturdays because my body is used to the early wake up call from the week. I read in bed for a while then got up. I walked to my car and had to smile to myself because of the Southern California weather in October. It feels like summer still.
The water was so calm and I was excited to get out there. We paddled out and found a spot by some boats and anchored down.
It felt so good to be out in the sun.
Kylan started off class telling us that stand-up paddle board yoga is pretty different from doing yoga on land.
Kylan led us through the integration poses. I thought to myself, wow even downward facing dog feels different. Your core is activated the entire time while you’re on the paddle board.
My next thought was, don’t fall in the water.
So I started off class pretty cautious and taking things slow and controlled. My main focus was not to fall in. Then I started to learn more about myself as we moved through the poses. I’ve always known I had perfectionist tendencies but being out in the water brought it out more. I wanted to stay dry on the board. I also know I am a risk-taker but the risks I take are usually calculated.
I couldn’t help but smile and laugh during the class because it felt amazing going back to the basics and feeling like a beginner again.
There’s just something about trying something new.
I love the playfulness and freedom that comes with it.
Then we tried some arm balances and inversions. It was so much fun! The board takes it to a whole new level.
And then, as I was watching the other two flow on their boards, I fell in the water! What? I know! I don’t even think I was doing a yoga pose but it happened.
I started to ask Kylan about falling. She has an incredible yoga practice and her inversions are amazing. Kylan mentioned she’s become really good at falling and knows her exit strategy.
That’s when I realized- I hold myself back in my inversion practice because I don’t want to fall. I’m afraid of falling. It was such a big moment for me because I am currently working on handstand and forearm stand in my practice. But there’s a lot of fear tied up with those poses for me: fear that I’ll fall or that I’ll get injured. Sometimes, there’s even a fear that I’ll actually get the pose.
Why do we let fear run our lives?
What are we keeping ourselves from doing because of fear? Whether it is yoga or anything else in life, it’s easy to hold ourselves back.
Today I realized I’m going to have to fall. A lot. And I’m going to have to try and it won’t be perfect right away.
Who knew that a stand-up paddle board yoga class would show me some areas in my life where I’m playing small and allowing fear and perfectionism to take over.
What are you fearful of?
What would happen if we just went for it and didn’t worry about falling?